Posted tagged ‘Dating & Relationships’

“I didn’t pick the best one. I picked the most trainable one.”

April 1, 2009

“I didn’t pick the best one. I picked the most trainable one.”
– A female friend when discussing her fiancee the other day

Geezus girl, we as men are not like your little doggies …But I do see where you are coming from. The reality is that men are in fact a lot like dogs. Our original “owners”, meaning our dear mamas, gave us our habits and attitudes towards women and relationships early on. That imprinting sticks with us through our adult lives.

What does this mean for you?

When we get to the point where you meet us, we are who we are. We’re not going to magically change into your ideal soul mate overnight, or ever. Think about it… We’re probably meeting you when we’re drunk, trying to get laid, or most likely both. We’re trying our hardest to impress you, doing everything in our power to win you over. The sad truth is that the illusion is going to turn into substance, or not, from there.

So back to this point of imprinting and character. Guys, take note of this too. It applies to both sexes.

It would be extremely difficult to find something to build on by the time someone got to you if there isn’t already something there to begin with. When looking for a potential LTR (long-term relationship), take note of how the person already is. A person is much like a high-rise building. You cannot build up and reach higher ground unless you have a solid foundation to begin with. So apply that to your potential relationships as well.

Ask yourself questions. Does this person have good manners? Do they treat others around them with respect? What’s his/her family life like? And do they eat out with a good attitude or do they boss the waiter around and then tip a dollar? (I used to be a waiter. Can you tell?) Questions like these will help you determine whether you have potential LTR material or just another here today-gone tomorrow (literally) fling.

The main point is that it is crucially important to have standards. For all the obvious reasons. But also consider that choosing a bad mate, much like bad jobs, bad dogs, and bad credit, can stick with you for a long time. And much like those other bad things, bad men/women are very hard to get rid of once they enter your life. So choose wisely and have standards from the get-go. You’ll save yourself time and headaches that way.

One last thing – For both sexes, there is NO perfect person for anyone. You’ve got to expect people to carry their life experiences, good and bad, with them. Some have baggage and that’s okay. Just avoid the ones with luggage and look for the gems who travel only with a carry-on. Know what I mean?

That’s my two cents. But who the heck am I besided another untrainable take-me-as-I-am male…

About the Author

He is a mid-twenties professional with a 4-year degee and good credit. He also cooks, cleans, and folds laundry. He may also be reasonably interesting and is even funny to some people (maybe). One thing he is not though is available. All you women are too crazy or have too much emotional baggage. See? My mom did teach me well. So there. šŸ˜›